Archive for January, 2010

Jan 06

in my dream .you’re back

after so long. dad finally came into my dream again last night.
after so so long. i’ve been missing him so much.

a lot of times when i dream of my dad .it is about him coming back home.
like finally he’s back home again after like what. ten years.
same goes to yesterday’s dream. he came back home.

i guess i really want him back so much.
in my dream, the first thing i do when i saw him in the house is run over to him.
and hug him .and cry.
i don’t know how long i actually hugged him, because i remember i didn’t want to let go.
i didn’t want him to leave me. and i keep crying and crying.

it’s like every time, a part of me know that i am dreaming.
and that’s why i try to make him stay as long as i could.
but dreams are always short. and in the end i have to wake up to this reality.
dad’s gone once again.

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dad. i’m a lot taller now.

it will be ten years very soon. but until today i’m still crying like he just leave me yesterday.
please appear more in my dreams. come home more. i miss you.

cry for the second time of the year. damn.

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Posted in :'(, daddy ♥, emo-emo *hurhur*

Jan 05

that once a year resolution

i guess i miss out the new year resolution.
well not exactly.

i asked myself what’s the point of having new year resolution anyway. not like i keep them.
but hey. of all sudden i feel like doing one and keeping them.
hah! see what kind of a person i am. always half on the left. another half on the right.

i’m gonna aim low this time. not gonna set the bar too high or else i’ll be doomed from the start.
so here it is..

1) i will tidy up my room everyday.
note to self: do not procrastinate! everyday means everyday. cannot say nevermind larh, tomorrow first.

2) i will go to uni and pay attention during class.
note to self: must pay attention! must!!! don’t day dream. listen to the lecturer!!! you can day dream and then fail your subject. pfft

3) i will not sleep late everyday. except on clubbing nights. and outings. and the days where i don’t have class on the next day. (okay i know i a bit too much. but i will try not to sleep too late during those exception nights)
note to self: sleep late then you wont be able to wake up for class. then you miss the class. then you miss what the lecturer teach then you fail. har har! and also you’ll get super panda eyes. and you’ll die earlier wtf. because damn unhealthy.

4) i’m gonna stop having irregular meals.
note to self: lunch time is between 12 to 2. not 5 oclock dumb ass. eat at the right time.

5) cut down the emotion and be a more optimistic girl.
note to self: friends always prefer the happier you. so try to cut down the emotion. *pats*

okay that’s all.
i will try my very very very best to keep this okay.
today is a good start by the way. i slept at 1 plus the night before and woke at 7 in the morning to go for 8 o’clock class.
and i really did pay attention in the class. like super good girl okay. for today larh. bwaha

i’ll see if i’ll still be this good at the end of the month.
omg, like very hard like that wtf. *inject positive thinking .positive thinking*

1
comments

Posted in mylife *meh*, ramblings *blabla*

Jan 04

4th of January

i cried.
first time of the year.

the song that is currently playing brought me to tears.
how the lyrics exactly describe the me back then. how very me.
all the memories came flashing back.

so vivid.
so vivid that my tears started rolling down . my heart ache.
no. not that kind of ‘you broke my heart into a million of pieces’ kind of shit heartache.
no. this is not some lovey dovey shit.

you know how when you watch a movie.
when the story goes perfectly fine .how so beautifully written and in a split second .tragedy hits.
that kind of heart ache.

the feeling of disappointment. i never in my life feel this disappointed before.
so very disappointed till i cry.

my friend disappoint me. a friend who i use to grow up together with.
who changed so much. from good to bad. from bad to worse.
from someone who is so like-able. to someone that you can hardly find a thing to like about.

i asked myself why. why did you turn into such a person.
am i to blame? am i the cause of your suffering?
a part of it yes. but to come to think of it .what resulted me in causing your suffering?
i guess you know it better than i do.

all the memories. so sweet yet so bitter.
it hurts to see a friend like you turning into a person like such.
are you truly happy?
you’re living in your own world. you shut your real self away.
you pretend. right?

i don’t know if you’re feeling sad. but me seeing you acting this way.
definitely made me tear.
it feels like. i lost a close friend. a very close friend.
not a very good feeling i must say.

i’m stupid enough to say all this. stupid enough to cry. stupid enough to feel upset.
but since i’m already that stupid. so just let me finish this.
stop doing that anymore. bring back the old you.

i hope my post did slap you hard. wake up already.
go. breakdown and cry. and lock this not-so-new you into a dark box .and bring back your old self.

i can only do this much.
i’m not gonna go any closer. i cant.
and im not willing to put myself out .just to get myself all hurt again.

really. there’s no more trust left. no more love.
there’s only this much.
you take care. friend.

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Posted in :'(, deep-thoughts *hmm*

Jan 03

Lets get it poppin. I’m in Miami bitch

second day of the year . i spend it at warehouse.
no. not the warehouse that sell loads of pweeeety dress.
it’s a club by poppy.

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* i saw thomas behind, lol.

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* love foon’s dress. looks like the one from forever 21.

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* cheeky mike.

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* ivan teng! you’re the best. and thanks for the sony pouch. (:

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* surprise. lee zan shaun.

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* thomas very mafan one. cannot tag him at facebook. can only do that after he goes back to perth. pfft

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* yo nigga!

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* haha, why yan look so cute. o.o

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* he damn not sober okay. cannot simply kiss okay. have to pay money okay. hmph.

that leezanshaun damn drunk. need weng kee to drive his car back.
then i left my stupid house key in the car .!! have to call my brother at 4 plus in the morning to open the door for me, kena wtf by my brother! hurhur

so leezanshaun passed me the key this noon. my mom’s at the living room.

mom: *smile sheepishly*
me: (wtf)
mom: yao hei fan mai yat chei ah? (get back together again?)
me: (zzz -_________- wtf) mehh? bin dou yao! (what? where got?)
mom: mou?? (no??)
me: yi goh sai gai, yao yeh giu peng yao geh. san jor dou hor yi zou peng yao. soh gah lei. mou hor leng okay. (in this world, there’s such things as friend. break up already also can be friend. you crazy. impossible okay.)

sighhh.. my mom!
see him means must ask me the same question wtf.
me is grown up girl. me see things differently now mama. not all things is possible okay.

*gasp* class is starting tomorrow and i have yet to check my timetable.
*pulls hair and run around* omg!! i’ll go check in sooooooooon!!

3
comments

Posted in :O, night life *aherm*, pictars *chikchak*, ramblings *blabla*

Jan 02

sick sick go away

second of january but it still feels like end of the year.

i wanted to stay at home on the new year itself.
but i was dragged by mahwengkee . to IPOH!!

he texted me. i said i’m quite tired.
then he called and said ‘come larh. come with us. you can sleep in the car.’
me: zzzzzzzz -_______- okloooooorrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhh .

i guess i should really stay at home .when we reached ipoh, i feel sick. omg
sick on the new year day itself. why oh why.
but i still get to eat the oh-so-famous ipoh chicken hor fun.
i’ve got slight fever and yet i feel so cold.
i feel cold but i still ate icecream potong. why i so like that?

it gets worse when i go to bed. off the aircon, put on my comforter and i’m still freezing.
freezing but my temperature go up up and up. plus headache. wtf ):

i’m better now but the headache is still here.
don’t do this to me. i wanna go out tonight. pffffttttt

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Posted in :(, ramblings *blabla*

Jan 01

hi there two-o-one-o !

helloooooooooo !! (:
happpppyyyy neeeeewwww yeeeeaaaaarrr darlinggs !

my very first post on twenty ten.
super efficient, bwaha.

my little cousins came to my house yesterday. still as mischievous. especially the elder one.
i talked to him. he stare at me and say ‘mm mou gong yeh’ . he asked me not to talk, wtf. *shakes head*
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* me after getting ready and the boy who asked me to shut up. pffft

waited for the twins to reach my house. wah yan curl my hair for me. :3 :3 :3
i first time curl my hair okay, like really curl. i gave my half virgin hair to low wah yan! :X

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* yan, foon and me. how’s my hair? :3 :3 :3

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* we went to tony roma’s and to be honest. i find their food a little too average. not really worth eating. chillis better.

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* our starter.

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* foon and ee. ahh, i like this picture. :D

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* sighhh! i think i left my camera pouch there cause it is no where to be found. gahh, why i so careless. :\

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* i tell you, the twins always cut their hair.. dye their hair.. do their hair.. so frequent omg.

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* happy new year darling girls. (:

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* ivan teng.

ate our dinner. chit chat. we talked about the worst and best thing that happened during zero nine.
the worst is of course i fail my blardy subject. pfffftt .as for the best, too much to mention. (:

me: maybe i can tolerate .it’s gonna be very hard at first but if in the end can change me into a less emo girl, it’s not that bad after all. it’s a good thing.
yan: wahh! know how to think already. big girl already.
me: -_____- swt .

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* walked over to the crowd after our dinner. not really that pack.

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* fireworks mode. forgot to switch back. :]

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* i ♥ to watch fireworks. who don’t.

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* i so hope you’re by my side .watching fireworks with me. celebrating new year with me. :3

we went back to weng kee’s house after that. to play lami. bwahahahha.
just a very normal new year for us. though i miss zero nine but nonetheless, i had a great night yesterday.
i start my twenty ten with a big smile. a very happy night. i’m a happy girl. ngehehe (:

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* my lami kakis.

i hope i’ll be as happy as last night throughout the whole year.
i know there will be some shit that’s gonna hit me. but i’ll just try to stay positive.
i’m quite tired being an emo girl, so i’ll try to change this year.
and be a happier peggy chow. (:

i hope all of you will be a happier person too.
so how’s your new year celebration? good?

2
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Posted in :3, :D, mylife *meh*, outings *ngehe*, pictars *chikchak*

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