I said this more often than I should and each time I said it I feel a little older.
365 days passed, since my last birthday party with the girls.
It definitely felt like yesterday to me.
Memories so vivid.
I remember the people and noises they make.
I remember the scene and colours.
I remember the laughter and smile on everyone’s’ faces.
I remember everything being so perfect but at that very same moment I felt like the loneliest girl in the world.
Surrounded by so many people and laughter but yet I feel absolutely isolated. I isolate myself.
I forced myself to put a smile on my face, or rather fake a smile.
Something bothered me. My brain couldn’t stop thinking, my heart couldn’t stop rushing.
I was nervous and upset all together, I do not know what exactly to feel.
I try to be happy. I am happy for having my scorpio girls with me and my friends.
But I wasn’t entirely happy.
I was feeling down. I was emotional and people can tell.
I can tell from their faces that they know I’m feeling really emotional deep down.
Somehow or rather the look in their eyes make me wish that I weren’t there.
I remember that night.
I remember how I felt.
One year, everything changes.
I feel silly for being so upset last year at my birthday party. I should enjoy.
This year, it will not be the same.
I will be so much happier, this is for sure. (:
I’m excited and nervous all together.
Very looking forward to spend my birthday with the guy I love. (:







